Szadika's Story
In Perfect Love and Perfect Peace
by Stephanie Russell
We hadn't really been expecting a baby.
We wanted to have one but it didn't seem very realistic considering everything that had gone on in our lives at the time. This was a second marriage for both of us. I already had three daughters and he had one. We were going through tremendous life-altering changes as well, not to mention that at 31 I was getting a bit older than I preferred to be for pregnancy but suddenly, here we were with positive pregnancy tests all over the place and me showing every early symptom.
I knew early on that I wanted a midwife and a homebirth. I was excited because I was under the (mistaken) impression that the ARNP I was seeing was a midwife as well. Tim and I gleefully went to our first appointment only to be rudely awakened to the fact that not only was my ARNP not a midwife but no one at the clinic even supported home birth as a viable option! I was very disappointed but I quickly cancelled my next appointment and Tim and I began the adventure of finding the perfect midwife. We found her in Melissa Jonas of Greenwood Midwives.
My first marriage was not one in which I felt I had the support to have a home birth even if I had always been interested so my first three daughters had all been born at our local Northwest Hospital. Finally I was going to do this the way I had always wanted to! I was nervous and yet very very excited as I filled out all necessary paperwork with Melissa. I loved having her come out to my home for all my appointments and my children loved it as well because she allowed them to help her listen to the baby's heart beat and take my blood pressure.
We planned for my eldest daughter Noelle, to be at the birth with us even though we knew it would be cutting it close as my daughters were scheduled to go on a trip with their grandparents for three weeks starting July 6th.
As the day drew closer we struggled to hold onto our ability to have a home birth due to health problems I was having. We went through many tests and I am so thankful for the doctor that I ended up with. She was very hesitant at my desire for a home birth and so she simply asked me what my reasons were. I explained that Tim and I felt that birth was an intimate experience and that we only wanted people to attend us that shared our ideas as opposed to the cookie-cutter system that the clinic adhered to. She told me that this was probably the most well-thought-out answer she had ever heard so she would do what she could to support me although she didn't necessarily condone it. As time went on, she told me that if it ended up that I had to be transported due to my health problem that was being so closely monitored, she would back up my birth which is a really big deal in Washington State right now. I appreciate her so much for her support during my pregnancy and beyond.
The day was drawing close...our due date was June 23rd but I was sure I would either be early or at least two weeks late. Our date came and went...so we were going to be late! Finally, the night of July 5th my contractions became regular and more 'there' so I called Melissa at about 2 am just to let her know what was going on then I went to bed. I slept very well just waking up for contractions and falling right back asleep. Then at about 7am I awoke to my water breaking! We were so excited and glad that we had put waterproof pads down on the bed and had gotten it double-made ahead of time.
By 8am my midwife was there and my doula, Carrie arrived by 8:30. Things were really underway!
This was Carrie's first birth as a doula but she was amazing and a year later, she is hosting her own workshops with great success. She constantly checked on me or worked with me...it was almost like she was psychically connected to my needs. She also checked on Tim often to be sure he was handling things alright.
As I moved through to transition, I got much quieter and Tim was wonderful. He held me through the entire labor as I could not lay down or do anything other than stand up with relative comfort. We tried so many different positions but they all were just terrible except standing. Transition lasted a very long time...about 4 hours and I wasn't making much progress so Melissa kicked everyone out except Tim and we labored together. Melissa had noticed that when we were alone I made good progress but when others were around I slowed down so she just checked in as often as was necessary and left us to ourselves. As hard as it was, I have to say it was probably one of the most romantic experiences I have ever had with my husband. It was amazing and we were so in tune. We are very connected anyways but this transcended. We had a pool set up in one of the kids bedroom with warm water and I was in and out of that many times with Noelle pouring water on my back and massaging me up until everyone left us to ourselves. Noelle was a little bit upset at being told to stay out so eventually she sneaked back in and sat at my head and just pet me. It was wonderful and a great bonding moment.
Later in the day the assistant midwife arrived and suggested that maybe I put one foot up on the edge of our bed during the next contraction and lean into it. My mom left to grab food for everyone because we all thought she had a little bit of time. With the next contraction I did as was suggested and leaned into it...suddenly I felt a huge DROP! With the next contraction I did the same but with my other foot and Szadika Phyre came crashing out with tremendous force. No one was expecting that! She didn't just come flying out because it took tremendous pushing on my side but it was like she had been hung up in there and when I changed the landscape of my pelvic region by lunging into my contractions, well...she was no longer hung up and that was all it took.
So I gave birth to my little angel standing up by our bed supported by Tim and Melissa with Noelle frantically trying to videotape the whole thing even though that wasn't her job...I am glad she remembered though because no one else did! She was screaming and crying 'the baby is coming! The baby is here!' all teary and happy. I looked up to see that Tim's entire face was covered in blood, my front was covered in blood and everyone in the room except Noelle was covered in blood! My mom walked in and said it looked as if a massacre had happened...but what had happened was that Szadie somehow broke her own unbilical cord! She didn't even have enough of one to clamp but everything came out alright and I felt like I have never felt before or since...excedingly powerful and complete. I would never do it any other way after that experience. I felt everything, I was aware of everything, I was part of the process and at one with my baby.
Szadika was born on July 6th, 2003 and Noelle got to leave on her US trip with her other grandparents just about an hour later. We bought BEG 1 week later and the rest is history:)
For Szadie's first birthday (just a few weeks ago at the time of this writing), we defrosted her placenta that we had saved all year and planted it with a baby hydrangea to grow as she grows.
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